Odyssey (Thursday Doors Writing Challenge)

art by Teagan Geneviene

My mind discusses possibilities with itself, running continuous films of monochromatic narratives without chapters or sequences, captioned with words too blurred to read.  The past is always fast-forwarding, as images and dialogue unravel and recombine in ways both mesmerizing and terrifying, full of could haves, should haves, and what ifs.

I feel sometimes as if I am already a ghost—not who I think I am—and who is it I think I am anyway?—existing nowhere I can locate in this world.  I have already moved far beyond it, or perhaps I never arrived.  I am governed by screens that stand between me and me, that render my actual position unknowable.

Am I astronaut, explorer, pilgrim, avatar?  Or am I but a mote of dust in the eye of the shadow of a consciousness that contains no self at all?

drifting in landscapes
of lost memories drawn in
faded black and white

Teagan’s art appealed to me because it seemed to contain so many stories. I started off thinking about my childhood (that car looks so familiar), but when I began writing it became something else. Best to follow the muse I find. And I know Teagan’s also been considering that nagging question: Who am I?

My second offering for the Thursday Doors Writing Challenge, open for the entire month of May, and hosted by Dan Antion. Anyone can join–you can see all the doors available to inspire you here.